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Sitting Down and Writing

But no matter the reason it can be difficult getting back into the habit of writing.

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It’s been some time since I’ve sat down and worked on any of my writing projects including this blog. Life, right it gets in the way. But no matter the reason it can be difficult getting back into the habit of writing. Not always, sometimes the story or poem just flow right out onto the page. Its wonderful when it happens. We all know it’s frustrating when we come back to a project and we no longer have a feel for it.

It can be very upsetting at times and if you let it get to you it only makes it harder. So just know that it happens, and it will happen again. Its awesome if you can devote some time every day to writing, but not all of us can do it or want to do it. I have other passions that I like to do and sometimes I just don’t have the time to write every day, or even every other day. And you know what, it’s okay. It’s okay to write when you feel like it.

I feel like there’s a lot of pressure on beginers. To be a good writer you must write every day. If you are going to turn this passion into a paying gig then yeah you really do need to spend some time honing your craft. But if this is just something you like doing for yourself then don’t worry about it. Do it the way you want too. Take long breaks, read some books, watch some movies, spend time with friends, play with your cat. Live your life and when you come back to your writing you’ll find that you have more to say.

I would love to be able to write every day. Sometimes I can make the time for it and sometimes not so much. But that’s okay. And it’s not to say that I’ve giving up on my dream of becoming a published author someday. Far from it, but I know that just to get a story written and read by a friend is enough for me. I hope to finish enough short stories to put together for a book. Maybe publish it on Amazon. It would be cool to do, to put my work out there. But I feel no rush to do it. It’s important to me that each one be the best I can do and properly edited. This is no small task so yeah going to take a while. But I am okay with that.

Happy writing.

Up Coming Hoildays 

Any way my birthday is fast approaching and I’ll be another year closer to death. But I get cake so it’s all good.

Just a quick post today since it’s been some weeks now. Halloween has come and gone and I watched many a horror movie. But I always watch horror movies so it’s not like it’s done for me. This is the life and every day is Halloween for me. 

Thanksgiving is coming up one of the worst holidays if your the one doing the cooking. I’m doing the cooking because I’m the one that cooks. So I have to get my ass in gear for that and get the shopping done and do all the prep plus the pies. FML. I do it to myself but that won’t stop me from blaming it on someone else. 

Why do I do it you ask? Because I love food! I love to eat and I love how it makes my little family so happy.  

No I will not become a food blogger. 

Any way my birthday is fast approaching and I’ll be another year closer to death. But I get cake so it’s all good. 

My wonderful husband got me the best gift and I got it early. He got me Elvira mistress of the dark’s ring. The big red one she wears in the movies. 


I am so in love with this ring! It’s the best gift I’ve ever gotten in my life. 

In a little over a week or so I’ll be celebrating my bday with my hubby and my best friend. Keeping it low key no big party with a lot of people. 

That’s life as of now. More to come soon. 

October is Here

The summer heat is fast fading. Making way for the cooler days of fall. And if you’re like me, a geeky horror fan, then you know that Halloween is not far off.

The summer heat is fast fading. Making way for the cooler days of fall. And if you’re like me, a geeky horror fan, then you know that Halloween is not far off. I am giddy with anticipation for the coming of my favorite holiday. Spooky themes abound and everyone is in the mood for a horror movie or two.

This is my time of year! This is when I can truly be myself and wave my creepy little flag and shin as the Goth that I am. Living in a small town as really put a damper on my Gothic sensibilities, so this time of the year when Halloween is in the air I can dress all in black and embrace all the spooky things that I love so very much.

grid-cell-13485-1414611986-32See, happy Goth.

I love to bake and make things so I might make a few things this year for Halloween. If I do, that is find the time, I’ll post them up here for all to see.

I truly love this time of year. Autumn is so fresh and crisp. I love the changing of the seasons, with its burst of color in the trees and the colder weather making it all feel cozy. There is nothing like curling up with a spooky book, a cup of tea and a warm blanket. The days grow short and the nights longer. It just feels magical and mysterious, no doubt because I love to read all about myths and legends. So many ghost stories, never enough time.

Well I’ll be watching horror movies all month. I think I will start with the Scream franchise and then see what peeks my interest. I know, I know, a lot of people don’t care for the Scream movies. But understand that for me Scream was the first R rated movie that I saw in theaters without an adult. So It’s kind of big deal. I will also watch Halloween, Halloween II, Friday the 13th, and A Nightmare on Elm Street.

I also plan to do some spooky reading. Edgar Allan Poe and H.P. Lovecraft for sure. Let me know how you celebrate Halloween in the comments.

 

Photo of Wednesday Addams found on google search.

Poetry, My First Love.

I feel in love with poetry at a young age. I read the greats and devoured each one in turn.

I’ve been reflecting on my early start at writing. At first short stories seemed beyond me, and anything longer than that was just so not going to happen. But I feel in love with poetry at a young age. I read the greats and devoured each one in turn. I would daydream about becoming a famous poet some day. So I began to write poems. Just little things that were not at all good. But it was a start. I was already a story-teller by nature.

I would tell my stories to my friends and share my little poems with them. They would encourage me to write then down. But any time I tried to write something more than a poem I just didn’t know where to start. From the age of 12 to my 20’s I only wrote poetry. As I wrote and read and talked to other friends that wrote I grew in my skills as a poet. Most of it wasn’t great, but that’s okay, I’m still very proud of it. I poured myself into my work and  pushed to do better.

Why did I push myself? Was it only for those silly dreams of becoming famous? While becoming famous would be epic but it’s not my reason why I wanted to become better. I love to write and I love poetry and so I wanted simply to be better as the thing I loved so very much.

Poetry for me was not only a way to be creative but it served as a way for me to express myself. Dealing with depression and anxiety was not at all easy but through my poetry I could talk about anything. That helped to give me courage in so many ways as a writer.

Poetry was my first love. I have quite the body of work now. No nothing published. As a confessional poet I find it difficult to put myself out there like that. I’ve kept my poetry privet. Shared only with a few friends.

Over the years I made the switch from poetry to short stories. It wasn’t easy to do but I had these stories to tell and they needed the outlet. Slowly my poetry took the back burner. Sometimes I write something new but mostly I’m just editing my body of work and rewriting a few poems here and there. I haven’t been feeling the pull that I had been for so long with my short stories. I feel like I should delve back into poetry for a while. Maybe I’ll even post something some time. Though just typing that causes my anxiety to spike. But us writers must me brave. So I will try to share something with you my readers.

Happy writing.

Worry

There are always things to worry about. Life is full of worries.

There are always things to worry about. Life is full of worries. We worry about money, work, and family. Most worries are fleeting as we go on with our day. Mostly we can still find the time to relax and not worry about all the things the stress us out.

If you’re like me and have anxiety then its a little harder to deal with those every day worries plus what the anxiety decides you will need to worry about on top of it all. I have learned to cope over the years. It’s still on going and will always be on going.

As hard as I have had it there are still others out there that have had it harder than me. This brings to mind a dear friend of mine dealing with a much more sever case of anxiety than mine are at least more sever than I am now.

She has not had an easy life and because of her childhood experiences she has been left with a crippling fear of the world. Her anxiety steams from this, I can see it and understand it. She does not. She only feels and believes that she is worthless.

She can not see what I see. And I see so many wonderful things in her. She is kind to everyone. She loves her friends dearly and will do anything for any one of them. She stands up for her friends thought she can’t do it for herself. She will give her last dollar to make sure her friends have eaten. She is warm, quiet, and sweet. She loves to laugh and loves to play video games. She loves anime and she loves reading. She is full of love for her family and no matter how they treat her she will not speak out against them.

The other day I saw her break. After a long period of effort she came crashing down. It broke my heart to see it. But I felt honored that she allowed me to be there with her and help her. Because in that vulnerable moment she spoke honestly about her pain. That’s never easy to do.

My dear friend is so far listening to my advice about getting help. All I and our friends can do now is keep encouraging her to keep going, to keep living. Because we love her and this world would be all the poorer without her in it.

Is This Writers Block?

Usually writers block comes at the start of a new project. The blank page and all that. This time is different, this time writers block as sneaked up on me. I didn’t realize it until today!

I’ve had writers block before and I know that it will pass and come again. It happens. Some times its worse than others and when it’s at its worst I put away my anxiety about it and just go live my life. I dive into a good book or two, I hang out with friends, try out new some new dinner ideas and do a lot of baking.

At the beginning of summer I had a lot of ideas. There was so much I wanted to do. But little by little my writing projects got put on the back burner. That’s okay thought I can get to them later, it’s no big loss there. Except now I just don’t feel like I know what to work on and when I think I do I can’t think of how to go about it.

Usually writers block comes at the start of a new project. The blank page and all that. This time is different, this time writers block as sneaked up on me. I didn’t realize it until today! This is extremely annoying because I’ve been living my life and doing all the stuff I do to help get over it. But I guess since I didn’t know it until now I’ll have to start ignoring it and going about my day-to-day life. This is not always easy to do but I know I can do it. After all I’ve done it before and will no doubt do it again.

Lucky me I have a good book to delve into and another to come out next month.

Happy writing.

Busy AF

So yeah I’m busy AF right now.

Just as I thought things had calmed down enough so that I would have some free time that could be devoted to this blog and other writing life steps in and says,”Oh no, not done with you yet.”

So here I am at 12:30am writing this post that I’ve been meaning to get done for weeks now. This right here is the first writing that I’ve done in months. There’s a lot of reasons for that. The first is that I just don’t have the time between caring for my grandmother and taking care of my own place. (My place looks like hell right now). When I get home after running around all day I sure as shit don’t feel like cleaning. But its time to get some of it done. So I am determined to vacuum and tidy up the living room but not until after I’ve had some sleep. Besides not having the time to write I just don’t seem to have the drive to do it like I usually do. I think it’s because prior to getting married I lived alone and now my husband lives here too and its taken some getting used too. It’s been wonderful having him here. But we are still figuring out this arrangement as far as when is a good time to bother the other. We are getting better at this but it’s still a work in progress. But I am sure we will get there. My last reason for not writing is that I just don’t know what to do or what to work on.

The story I was working on just seems to be at a stand still and I can’t seem to figure out what I want to do with the plot. I have an outline but I don’t think I’ll be sticking too it. Perhaps I should just rewrite the outline. Now that this story is at a stand still for the moment I’ve been thinking of this other idea for a story. In the process of research and I think it will take a while to finish. The research is necessary but annoying.

So yeah I’m busy AF right now. But I have not forgotten about this blog. I will keep posting. So please keep commenting and liking and following.